Rihanna Loses it for Esquire

And by it, I mean her hygiene. Some may consider these pics sexy and daring (yeah, the girl has a killer body) but to me it looks like she may have dirt in places where there shouldn't be dirt. A full body exfoliation is sometimes quite nice, but not if you've been buried alive and then fought your way out of the muck, and in the process lost some clothing. Poor thing. I hope she wasn't too traumatized by the experience.

[Image via Esquire Magazine]

What in the CRAP is this?!?!??!

I am almost at a loss for words. Almost. Apparently Lance Bass started a new boy band group, Heart2Heart (seriously), and their first single "Facebook Official" hit the web last week. At first I thought it was a parody, then I thought it was a joke, and then I realized that it might be legit. Omg, it's sooooooooooooo bad! The hair, the make-up, the excessive winking. I feel dirty. It's so bad it makes me uncomfortable. You know the world is ending when someone actually writes a song about Facebook. Damn you again Mark Zuckerberg!

Everyone is a Vampire!

I find this so incredibly awesome that I can't even stand it.  You guys have surely heard about this already, but word on the internets is that photographic proof has been found that Nicolas Cage is a vampire from the Civil War era.  I mean, we can't argue with photographic proof, people!  Just look at that picture.  It's totally Nic Cage as a vampire pretending to be a highly respectful (um, bow tie says it all) and educated thespian from the late 1800s.  Totally. 

And now we can add John Travolta to that vampire list.  MORE photographic proof has been uncovered that John Travolta was also a Civil War gentleman turned vamper!  Eeeek!  I'm going to be totally pissed if, in a couple of months, these two announce that they're doing a Civil War vamper flick together and that these damn photos were leaked by an intern (named Nicolas Travolta) to create buzz. 

So, who's next?  Um, how about Sean Young?  Or Richard Grieco?  Oh oh oh!  Gary Busey!  He can already unhinge his jaw, so yeah, he's definitely a vampire.

Most Popular Halloween Costumes

If you know me, then you know that I absolutely love LOVE this time of year.  I mean, I live in the Halloween capital of the world (however, just to clarify, that's not actually why I ended up moving there, but mostly because it was the only affordable area to buy a condo), I kicked off my annual scary movie month last week, and I'm gearing up for the annual Haunted Happenings parade which will take place tomorrow night in downtown Salem.  In anticipation of the crazy people that will definitely be dressed up in costume tomorrow night, I did a little exploring today to find out what the most popular costumes are for Halloween 2011 and, to be honest, I'm surprised by the #1 choice (although, totally fitting for Salem):

1. Witch
2. Pirate
3. Vampire
4. Zombie
5. Batman

I'm surprised not to see werewolf on there, and am totally relieved not to see sexy nurse or slutty kitten, so I applaud all the sluts out there for going with different costume ideas this year.  What are you guys dressing up as?

[Image via AMC's The Walking Dead]

Totally Obsessed with: Treehouses

Right now, I can't get enough of treehouses.  Now, I'm not necessarily talking about the kind of treehouse your friend had growing up - and I say friend in this instance because I never had a treehouse when I was a kid, but I did have a lot of forts, which were just as much fun (I think).  I'm talking about adult versions of treehouses.  Swanky amazeballs treehouses that you could move into tomorrow and live out your days lounging on your deck with you feet up on a treelimb, reading a book and sipping a glass of wine. 

My fiance and I are getting married in less than two weeks and while we're not taking a full-on honeymoon until sometime next year, I've been doing some browsing online to see what kind of honeymoon we might want to consider.  For me, I adore Italy and would go back in a second, but I also think that we should be a little more adventurous and do something different.  It's pretty impressive how many treehouse type villas are available to rent all over the world.  I've include some pics of some of my favorites below - enjoy!

The majority of these charming abodes can be rented via airbnb. And if you don't know about this website yet, you should definitely check it out. It's brilliant.

People are Taking this Vampire Thing a Bit too Far

Now, I'm a fan of vampires. I'm totally obsessed with True Blood and I enjoy a saucy vampire novel as much as any fainting 16 year old. I may or may not have watched the Twilight movies (and read the books) and yes, sometimes I swoon at the brooding and darkness that is a vampire. But ths crazy bitch is taking the whole vampire thing a bit too far. Josephine Rebecca Smith, a resident of St. Petersburg, FL, truly believes she's a vampire and attacked a 69 year old disabled man at a, wait for it, vacant Hooters. Of anywhere, the last place I would have expected a Hooters to tank is Florida.

The old man met his vampire, 22 year old Smith, at a gas station and then invited her back to the porch of the vacant Hooters where he was staying. I mean, why else would a 22 year old follow a disabled wheelchaired old man back to a vacant Hooters unless she was going to suck his blood? And who knew the gas station was a good place to hook up? Anyway, the old guy fell asleep on the ground and that's when Smith made her move. The best part? The old man somehow managed to escape, wheel back to the gas station, and call for help. The police found the alleged vampire on the Hooters porch, half naked and covered in the old man's blood. I like that she stuck around, kind of like wanting to show off the fact that she was hanging out on a vacant Hooters' porch, half naked, soaked in blood. I mean, it could have been BBQ sauce for all we know. Apparently Hooters has good wings.

[Image via Sonic Eclectic]

Gwnny Looks Goopy

I love Gwyneth Paltrow. Seriously, I do. She's gorgeous, she's funny, she can cook, she can dress, and she can act. And I love her blog GOOP. Having said all that, though, I do absolutely delight in photos like this one of gorgeous Gwyn when celebrities are photographed looking less than perfect.

[Image via WENN]

A Soundtrack for Books

This sounds pretty cool, but I'm still a little unsure about how well it will work.  Apparently this new company, Booktrack, has created synchronized soundtracks for e-books that dramatically boost the reader's imagination and engagement. The company's proprietary technology combines music, sound effects and ambient sound, automatically paced to an individual's reading speed. This is the part I'm unsure about, but if they can actually pace the sound effects and music to an individual's reading speed, then they've got some serious magic.

You can download the app to your iPhone or iPad and just start reading. If the characters go to the beach, you’ll hear waves crashing and seagulls squawking. Or maybe a character is being chased by a pack of dogs, which will sound heavy footsteps and ragged breathing, dogs barking and snarling.

You can read more about Booktrack here.

Who Does Marc Anthony Think He Is?

I'd like to know something.  How the frick does Marc Anthony get so much hot ass?  I mean, he and JLo just split and now he's rumored to be frolicking with Jada Pinkett Smith.  Before JLo, he had another hot wife.  I mean, WTF?  I just don't get it.  He looks like a Mexican drug lord (okay, I know Marc's not Mexican, but "Puerto Rican drug lord" doesn't sound as badass).  I guess there's one obvious answer, which lies in his pants, but I definitely don't think that's the case.  Everything about him is slender and petite.  He is a good dancer (allegedly), so maybe he just knows how to work it - all of it - for his lady friends.  I'm still suspect though.

Find Your Happy Place

Man, I fricking love http://www.happyplace.com/.  Normally it makes me laugh to the point where I'm snorting, hiccuping, and trying not to pee my pants.  If you like laughing and almost peeing your pants, then check it out NOW.  Especially this and this.  You will not be sorry.

Remember Taylor Dane?

I bet now you wish you didn't.  She looks like Vince Neil in drag.  I think she's trying to bring this look back.

[Image via Splash]

Madonna's Face Decides it's Time to Turn Old

Now, don't get me wrong, I like Madonna.  I don't love her, but I like her.  And, she's impressed me with her rockin body over the years.  She's 53 years old people, and her body is rock solid.  Her face, however...well, that's another story.  I'm fairly certain that Madge freaked out a few years ago about the fact that she was nearing 50 and had some work done to "help" keep her looking young.  I think she should fire her plastic surgeon because he went and made her look, well, bad.  It's really unfortunate because I really thought she was aging very well, but then she went and did this and now I think she looks awful.  It's really a shame that celebrities think that, just because they're getting older, they have to get work done to make them retain their youthful appearance.  You know what?  It hardly every works.  I think some people age gracefully (Demi Moore) and some don't (Helen Hunt).  Deal with it, ladies.  Work what yo mama gave you, work it fierce, and love the body, and face, you've got.  Because your plastic surgeon doesn't give a rat's ass.

Check out Madonna just 10 years ago in her "Don't Tell Me" video.  Hot, right?  She looks amazing.



[Image via WENN]

Magic Mike Cast Will Surely Entice You

So, I've been hearing lots of rumors about the 2012 male stripper movie called Magic Mike and after the article I just read, I think this is going to be the best movie EVER.  The movie is set to star:

Joe Manganiello
Matt Bomer
Channing Tatum
Alex Pettyfer
Matthew McConaughey

The hottie in the pic is Joe Manganiello.  He plays a werewolf on HBO's True Blood and holy amazaballs, he is ridiculously hot.  Allegedly, he'll do a full frontal nude scene in Magic Mike.  Um, yeah, my brain just exploded.  Can you EVEN imagine what that's going to look like on a the big screen?  I'm sweating.

The film will be directed by Steven Soderbergh, so it has to be fantastic.  No release date has been announced, but man, I can't wait to see how this turns out. 

 

New Florence + the Machine

This is a must listen!

Man Arrested for Popping Zits in Public

Yeah, you read that right. And the best part? He was popping zits ON HIS BACK. Outside a McDonald's. Apparently when the cops approached him to tell him to vacate the premises, he took off, so the cops chased him. When they finally caught him, they found a syringe in his pocket that he allegedly used (according to his lovely girlfriend) to shoot up "blues" - aka Oxycontin. So, let me get this straight. A dude (who was very flexible) standing outside of CrackDonald's popping his back zits had drugs on him AND was probably under the influence of drugs? Seems a bit out of the ordinary to me.  

Good-bye Manners. Hello Anger.

Well, I've been chewing on this for a while now, but it's 100% official. Manners are no more. Instead they've been replaced with selfishness, arrogance, rudeness, disdain, disrespect, entitlement, and ignorance. Remember when road rage was so shocking? Like, how could some guy get out of his car and punch another guy in the face because he cut him off? Isn't it interesting how you don't necessarily hear about road rage anymore? Instead, road rage has been replaced with compliance. People have just gotten so used to everyone being assholes on the road that no one cares anymore. And instead of freaking out, they just go with the flow and now we have even more assholes out there driving humungous SUVs while talking on their cell phones, smoking a cigarette, and applying mascara. But, wait, I was talking about manners in general, not necessarily idiot drivers.   

Going into the office yesterday I was walking behind a woman, probably in her 50s, talking on her cell phone. I was probably eight steps behind her and my hands were full. She opened the door to the building and looked over her shoulder quickly, made eye contact with me, and then proceeded to walk into the entryway, without holding the door for me. Nice.

On Friday of last week I stopped by Trader Joe's to pick up a few things. I got in line and there was an empty cart in front of me but no one standing nearby. The cashier waved me forward and said that the customer went out to her car to get her reusable bags. So, I proceed to check out and the woman comes in with her bags and says, very loudly, "why would you go in front of me if it was clear that I was in line?" When the cashier commented that there was a line forming and that she needed to service customers who were ready, the woman yanked her cart out of line, abandoned it by the exit, and walked out. Really?

I was walking down the sidewalk a few weeks ago, going to run an errand on my lunch break, and I don't know about you guys, but I walk down the sidewalk on the right side, which I think is the normal way to do it. So, there I am, walking, and I come to a corner, so I turn the corner, practically hugging it, and someone coming in the opposite direction slams into me, knocking my bag off my arm and onto the ground, where some of the contents spilled out. Startled, I step back, and the man who ran into me (who wasn't your typical Malden-ite, but dressed in a suit and seemed to maybe have more manners) says "Jesus Christ, watch where you're f--king going!" and storms off. Yeah, because I can totally see through concrete walls to see who's barreling down the sidewalk on the WRONG SIDE. Jackass.

Back in November, my fiance, Alf, was walking our dog Roscoe on his normal morning walk. There's a fairly busy road near our house that we have to cross to go to the dog park, and for some reason Roscoe can't just cross this street walking calmly. He bounces and flails until he's on the other side, and sometimes it's very hard maneuvering because he bumps into you. Anyway, Alf started to jog across the street and he and Roscoe became entangled and, well, they're both very leggy and lanky and one thing lead to another and Alf fell very awkwardly and slammed his shoulder into the sidewalk. Hard. It wasn't like he tripped and regained his balance. He totally fell head first to the ground. There were several witnesses. Not one of them stopped to find out if he was okay. There he is, practically laying in the street, and not one person stopped to see if he needed assitance (he did, btw, and I ended up taking him to the ER soon thereafter but thankfully he didn't break anything). WTF?

So, I think you know where I'm going with this. How hard is it to hold a door for someone, or maybe say you're sorry for running into them? It really makes me angry to think that these normal every day manners that we used to use on a regular basis are close to extinction. I try, and it's not like I have to try very hard people, to be mindful of my surroundings every day. I let people get in front of me in traffic, I hold the door for people (even if they're 20 feet away), I say excuse me and sorry if I bump into someone or if I need to pass them, I say thank you to the cashier at CVS, even though she's a miserable bitch. I mean, it's not like it's very hard. Right? Right??      

Katie Holmes Embraces Her Dark Side

Wow, I barely even recognized Katie Holmes in the August issue of Vogue Spain.  She looks seriously thin, right?  Good God woman, eat a sweet muffin with extra butter or something!

This is Ridiculous

Honestly, this girl is so fricking dumb that it's infuriating.  Apparently Kim Kardashian has recently revealed to Cosmo that she's never farted or pooped.  Ever.  EVER.  Because that's totally possible.  Maybe she really is a robot.  Or, she's an internal parasites, or a bee, wasp or ant larvae. (According to the researchers, all of these possess "a blind gut" that prevents continuous passage from the mouth to the anus and ensures that waste cannot be evacuated.) So, maybe she's a curvaceous woman by day and then by night she turns into a parasite?  Wait, hold on a minute.  By definition, a parasite is:

a.  An organism that grows, feeds, and is sheltered on or in a different organism while contributing nothing to the survival of its host.

b.  One who habitually takes advantage of the generosity of others without making any useful return.

c.  One who lives off and flatters the rich; a sycophant.

Well, I'll be damned.  I guess Kim is right after all... 

[Image via Oh No They Didn't!]
 






 

Hot Dudes with Kittens

Hot Dudes with Kittens from Sam Trammell

Holy Shit Snacks!

Wow.  Wow.  WOW.  WOWZA!!  You all know my boyfriend, Alexander Skarsgård.  Well, he's in this month's Interview Magazine and, well, see for yourself.  Holy hot pot of coffee!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Images via Interview Magazine]

Getting Beach Ready

Ok, so I know I'm getting ahead of myself with this since the sun just came out for the first time in months in Boston yesterday, but I'm actually really looking forward to spending time on the beach this year.  I'm not the best beach person, mostly because I can't be in the sun for more than 20 minutes at a time, but I do love going and relaxing with a good book.  So, in ancticipation of the beach season, I've been checking out some of the must have beach accessories for 2011 and thought I'd share a few:

A super soft and sassy beach towel - thanks, Roxy, for this little gem:

Sperry's women's Jellyfish Thong in this cute nautical print:

I bought a great swimsuit cover-up last season at Nordstroms that basically looks like an oversized men's button up shirt and I LOVE it.  It's blue and white striped, long sleeve (however, I normally roll the sleeves up), it's lightweight, and it looks fantastic by itself or paired with shorts and flip flops.  Of course Nordstroms doesn't have it available anymore, but Jcrew has something similar:

A cute straw fedora to wear while floating in the water (my scalp always get burned when I'm swimming!):

Sunblock, sunblock, and sunblock!  I never ever go anywhere without putting at least some kind of SPF on my face, and at the beach, I am a Nazi about applying and reapplying.  But, I hate the sun block lotions, so I always buy sprays (what can I say, I'm lazy).  One of my go-to products is Banana Boat Ultra Mist Sport Sunblock Spray, which I use just on my body.  For my face, I normally need something more sensitive and more powerful and I absolutely love Neutrogena Sunblock Stick.  I keep one in my bag at all times because it comes in handy for those unplanned lunches on a patio or deck.  But, in the off chance that I do burn my face, this comes in mighty handy.  And don't forget chapstick!

A good beach read:

A practical and sturdy beach tote to lug all your essentials in:

 Plus a cooler to bring lots of water, fruit, a sandwich, and whatever else you like to snack on:

This is definitely a must have for the girl who can't be in the sun very long but still loves to hang out on the beach.  And for $10, you'd be silly not to buy one!

Are you wanting to hit the beach now?!

This is RIDICULOUS!

I can't believe I'm blogging about this, but People magazine just released the first pictures of Kim Kardashian's engagement ring.  20.5 carats.  20.5 CARATS!!!!!!!!!!  How in the FRICK can she afford something like this ($2 Million!), cause, let's be honest, she's definitely the bread winner in that relationship (I can't believe I just said that).

Holy Hell!

WHOA! What in the crap happened to Bristol Palin's face?!??!  I mean, she doesn't even look like the same person.  Looks like Miss I Can't Dance visited Mommy's plastic surgeon.  I guess we should be thankful she didn't opt for the pig with lipstick look.  Or was it a pitt bull?  Or a hockey mom?  Oh, cripes, I can't remember.   

[Imave via Celebitchy]

Cry Macho

Yes, that's the name of Arnold Schwarzenegger's new film.  Seriously.  Cry Macho.  I don't even know what to say.

Jamie Foxx is Dating Stacey Dash?!

How in the hell did I not know this!?!?  And apparently they've been dating for a while.  Huh.  I guess my celebrity gossip obsession isn't really that much of an obsession after all... Anyway, Stacey Dash is lovely (and she's 45 and has like four kids!) but I think Jamie Foxx is going to play her, if he hasn't already.  Any man who sings about blaming his actions on the al-al-al-al-al-al-cohol is suspect.  Also, Stacey, honey, you're gorgeous, but please please please wear a dress that fits you up top. Your girls don't look so hot in that dress...they just look, well, trashy.  I see a nip slip in her future.

[Image via WENN] 

Celebrity Commencement Speakers

Tis the season for graduations and I'm headed to #2 this weekend.  Sadly, no celebrity guest speaker is scheduled to address the crowd, but CNN just posted this year's celebrity commencement speakers and, yes, I'm jealous that I won't be seeing a couple of these...

• Amy Poehler - Harvard University (and Amy's a BC alumni...gasp!)
• Stephen Colbert - Northwestern University (his alma mater)
• Denzel Washington - University of Washington...ha!  No, kidding.  He'll be speaking at U of Pennsylvania
• Brooke Shields - Princeton (her alma mater)
• Tom Hanks - Yale University
• Chelsea Handler - Emory University (her two siblings attended Emory)
• Bill Cosby - Hampton University (Mr. Cosby has done more than 30 commencement addresses!)

[Image via Own the Dollar]

Friday Night Lights Auction

Sad to see Friday Night Lights wrapping up?  Sure, the series finale may be this year, but you can try to hold onto the show forever by heading over to NBC Universal's FNL auction and placing a bid on Tim Riggins' sweatshirt or Matt Saracen's hoodie or Coach Taylor's play book.  The auction is being hosted by ebay and it looks like there's already been quite a few bids placed already.  Don't miss out on your chance to own a piece of FNL history (or, maybe you just want to be able to sleep with Tim Riggins' sweatshirt every night).

Is 39 too Old to Wear a Mini? Yes!

I'm sorry, but I don't care how amazing you look, there IS an age limit on mini skirts and dresses.  Cam looks amazing for 39 (well, from the neck down anyway, and aside from the douchebag that's usually attached to her arm), but seriously, ENOUGH with the frickin mini skirts and dresses (especially ones that are tooooo tight!)!  Cripes, you're almost 40!  Let go of your 20s and move on. 

[Image via Celebitchy]

Thank You, Beastie Boys

First: love love love Elijah Wood in this video (and can't wait to see him in the FX series, Wilfred, coming in June).  Second: the Beastie's are still amazeballs cool, even after 25 years.

Beastie Boys - Make Some Noise - Free Music Videos - Top Songs

A New Way to Say Hello

Apparently this is the new way to greet friends, family and strangers in L.A.  Thanks, Nicole Scherzinger, for always keeping things exciting.

[Image via Pacific Coast News]

Taylor Kitsch at NYC Premiere of Bang Bang Club

Taylor Kitsch and Ryan Phillippe brought the hotness to NYC on April 21st when they attended the NYC premiere of their latest film, Bang Bang Club.  I have no idea what the film is about, but with a title like that, I can only guess that this may be their first professional porn film.  And if so, when the frick does it open in theaters?! 

[Image via OK! Magazine]

A Swoon-worthy Outdoor Movie Theater

I want this.  I want this right.  Now.  I absolutely LOVE this.  If I only had the outdoor space...and a ton of money.  Thank you, Pottery Barn, for the great idea.  Now I just need to buy a new house with a bigger yard and get a new job that pays me a LOT more than what I currently make.

Endless

I don't know how I didn't know about this before now, but I just discovered Endless.com, a shoes and accessories mega store of amazingess.  Love these Seychelles Eye to Eye wedge for a $110:

And, I'm not really a fan of Crocs (those damn clogs should be outlawed), so I was completely shocked when I saw that these little cuties are Crocs.  Easy to slip on to run weekend errands, walk the dog, or work in the garden.  And only $35!

This Kate Spade High Tide medium flat cosmetic bag is perfect for, yes, cosmetics, but what an adorable clutch for an afternoon lunch with the girls, or a perfect spot to store your iPhone, earbuds, and weekly planner in your bag:

There is a lot to look at and the possibilities are, well, Endless!

Man and Woman's Best Friend

Since Alf and I got engaged on Christmas Day, I've been spending a lot of time on wedding blogs. A. Lot. I've become a little obsessed. And I'm having a blast. Anyway, I stumbled on this picture and had to share. How adorable are these two?!

[Image via Joe Mikos Photographers]

Heaven on Four Wheels

Did You Know?

Did you know that gravity is weaker in North America than it is in Europe, East Asia, Australia, and North Africa?  Well, I didn't.  Apparently it's because Earth is not a perfect sphere, and its interior mass is not evenly distributed. There are slight variations of gravitational pull depending on where on Earth’s surface you are.


In fact, you can now check to see which points on the Earth’s surface have the strongest and weakest gravitational pulls with a “gravity map”, available at BBC.com. The map is a 3-dimensional model of the earth that represents the amount of gravitational pull on a specific point on the Earth as its altitude. It uses data compiled from the Gravity Field and Steady-State Ocean Circulation Explorer (GOCE).

As my friend Miley Cyrus always says, "that's pretty cool!"
Source: OMG Facts, BBC
[Image via Tree Hugger]

Off the Beaten Path

My fiance and I are getting married this September but we're waiting until next year to embark on a honeymoon (honestly, I don't know how people plan their wedding AND their honeymoon to happen one after the other).  I've just started poking around online to plan the ideal trip and I have to say, what I originally thought would be an easy decision (um, Italy is my favorite place on Earth, so that was an obvious choice), is turning out to be rather difficult!  There are so many places that I still have yet to discover, and there are so many amazing honeymoon destitations out there - how do you choose? 

I stumbled upon a posting on Grey Likes Weddings and immediately fell in love, and not just for a honeymoon but for a typical vacation getaway.  Rent (well, more like try to find!) a vintage airstream trailer and travel around the country, stopping wherever the hell you please and doing whatever the hell you want for a few weeks.  It doesn't necessarily sound exotic, but the pictures have me wanting to book it right now.

[Images via Wendy Nordeck]

It's Britney vs. Britney!

Pop Dust has put together a nearly three minute clip of a dance off between the old Brit vs. the new Brit.  Hmmm, I think it's fairly obvious who the winner is.

 

He Ain't No Lloyd Christmas

Jim Carrey is sporting a new do, which seems like an odd choice for the 49 year old.  Or maybe it's the glasses that I'm having a hard time with.  He looks like he's trying to be Pink's dad.  Or maybe he and Pete Wentz are hanging out?

[Image via TV Guide]

This Sounds Like a Terrible Idea

Word on the street today is that Victoria Beckham wants to name her unborn daughter Santa after Santa Monica. Ok, we know that the Beckhams have a thing for naming their babies after where they were conceived, but Santa???  Do they not hear how ridiculous this sounds?  According to OK! Magazine, a Beckham source revealed that “Posh thinks Santa Beckham has a lovely ring to it and wants something unique."  Why not Monica?  I mean, wouldn't you rather your child potentially be associated with crazy Monica Geller instead of an old, fat white dude that loves giving gifts to children?   

Yeah, and she's around 5 months pregnant in this picture.  Hate. Her.

[Image via OK! Magazine]